Sara's blog
by CSI-babe1
Summary: when Sara is feeling depressed over the whole Grissom issue, Cathrine gives her some advice which helps a lot. sorry i suck at summaries but enjoy and please R&R. rated T for later chapters


**A/N: **i don't own anything sadly but i hope you enjoy the first chapter of my story please read and review =]

**Summary:** when Sara is feeling depressed over the whole Grissom issue, Cathrine gives her some advice which helps a lot. sorry i suck at summaries but enjoy and please R&R

* * *

Sara sighed as she saw Grissom rush into his office like it was his getaway or escape from reality. She looked away and continued to read her magazine, forensics weekly. The article that was there made her laugh slightly. A woman killing a man for not loving her, sometimes she felt like doing that to Grissom for making her hurt badly.

As Cathrine entered the room she put the thought to the side and put her 'work' face on. "hey Cath." she greeted with a smile.

"Hi, anyone else here yet?" Cathrine asked while pouring herself a cup of coffee.

"Only Grissom but he's in his office as usual. Sometimes I don't see the point in him coming into work, all he does is sit in his office alone." she replied looking back at Grissom's office.

"Well you know him , he's not really a people person."

"you got that right." she said laughing again.

The two women sat reading there magazines. Sara continued to read the article.

_Katrina Mabble, aged 31 stabbed a man in the chest 4 times. She confessed to the police for killing him and said 'I was only making him feel the pain he made me feel.' she was given 25 - life and said she would never regret it. _

'_when we met I thought we were soul mates. I fell in love with him and I thought he felt the same. We spent years just being friends but I wanted more. I told him about my feelings and he said that he didn't know what to do. I left with a broken heart. He closed himself off from me afterwards and I cried all the time so I thought I would teach him a lesson. I went over to his place but he told me to leave. I picked up a knife from his kitchen and stabbed him in the heart, like he did to me, but I did it literately.'_

_He was found 2 days later in his kitchen, suspects say that they heard a heated row and saw Katrina running from the house in tears. I guess that what guys get when they break girls hearts. _

_James Hannel, forensics weekly._

Sara sighed, if it wasn't for the names then she could have said that the first part of that story was her life. She threw the magazine down and rubbed her eyes. Cathrine looked up at he. "you ok?" she asked putting down her fashion magazine.

"yeah, fine." she replied putting on a fake smile.

"you want to talk about it? Cause I'm here you know." Cathrine said sympathetically.

"thanks but I'm not the kinda person to talk to people about this stuff, I'm more of a keep it to yourself girl." Sara said.

"y'know what you should do? Make a blog online. that's what Lindsay did, whenever the day of Eddie's funeral came about she practically told the whole world without saying to some one." Cathrine said, writing down a web address on a piece of paper.

"you mean just tell everyone all your problems and they don't even know who you are?" Sara asked raising her eyebrows.

"yeah, people read them and find them interesting. It takes the weight of your chest. Trust me I tried it, you should to." she said handing her the piece of paper.

"Thanks Cath." she said "I might try it out."

The rest of the team walked in and sat down. Sara folded the piece of paper and put it in her trouser pocket. Grissom also walked in with assignments.

"Ok lets get down to business. Sara and Greg B+E downtown. Warrick and Nick, 419 in Henderson. Brass said it was pretty messy. Cath you're with me, body dump in the dessert." he said handing the pieces of paper to everyone.

--

Grissom and Cath sat in the Denali on the way to their crime scene. Cathrine who was in the passengers seat turned to Grissom.

"you should talk to her." she said making him frown.

"who?"

"Sara, she's kinda low right now, you might do her some good."

"I doubt it, all we seem to do is argue."

"yeah and whose fault is that?"

"what?! I never did anything wrong, she just seems to be mad at me all the time."

Cathrine sighed and turned to look out the window. "can I ask you something?"

"well if its gonna be something bitchy then no."

"do you know any woman who would just drop everything in her life, leave it all behind because a distant friend that you haven't seen in over 3 years phones and asks you to move state to just help him out?"

"yes, Sara."

"any other woman?"

"I can't think of one right now…"

"that's because they don't. Sara came here because she loves you. Every person in the world knows it and you are the only one who seems oblivious to it." she said sternly making Grissom sigh.

"can we put this to the side while we work." he said as they pulled up to the crime scene.

--

Later on that evening, Sara sat at home in front of her laptop. She was on the website Cathrine had given her. She was surprised when she saw how many people had these blogs. She sighed as she hit the register button. _here goes nothing_ she thought as she filled out her details.

A few minutes later she had up on screen her very own blank blog. She uploaded a picture of herself, taken for the Adoption remembrance plan a few months ago. She put her fingers on the key board and before she knew it she was pouring her heart out.

_Hi everybody. My name is Sara Sidle, I'm a CSI and a pretty good one at that. _

_my friend recomended this website so i might as well give it a try right? so here is my life story, a part of it anyway._

_9 years ago I moved to Vegas from San Francisco because of one man. We met at a seminar on entomology, we became really good friends in that whole month. After he left though I felt an ache in my heart, like something was missing. I knew that I was in love with him. _

_We stayed in touch for a few months but then we stopped calling or emailing each other because we both were so busy. I missed him so much y'know. I held a picture at night hoping that the man in the photo would suddenly appear and tell me he loves me. _

_Well I almost got my dream. One day 7 years ago he called me and asked me to come to Vegas, I couldn't believe it, I thought he asked me because he loved me and so desperately wanted to be with me but I was wrong. I dropped my life in San Fran only to work for him. _

_Now it's torture to see him everyday. Although he locks himself in his office and only comes out when he needs to. I feel like he ripped my heart out, stood on it and then threw it out the window. I cry all the time and hoping that one day he might turn around and passionately kiss me, tell me that he loves me and always has. _

_I don't know maybe I'm being stupid. Loving someone who I know will never love me back. _

_Sara xx _

She sat back on her chair and looked at her long story. It did feel good like Cathrine said it would. If only she known about this years ago.

She clicked the 'add to blog' button and then turned her laptop off to have another night of loneliness

---

The night seemed to go quicker than usual and Sara woke up in the morning feeling the best she ever felt in ages. She looked at her laptop and then at the alarm clock. 8.26am. She raised her eyebrows and almost gasped. She had slept more than she had in 4 years.

--

Cathrine sat at her computer after Lindsay had left. She knew Sara wouldn't make a blog if it risked her being vulnerable but she decided to check it anyway.

She logged in and searched for Sara Sidle in 'recently added' and to her surprise it came up with Sara's picture. Cathrine raised her eyebrows as she clicked on it.

Slowly she read it and was almost in tears, she thought of the pain Sara must have gone through. Suddenly she picked up the phone and dialled a number.

"Grissom"

"hey it Cathrine, can you do me a favour?" she asked

"sure, do you need me to cover for you?"

"no, I need you to read something online. It's called , it might do you some good."

Grissom was already at his laptop. He typed in the web address and when it came up he frowned. "Cath what is this?" he asked slightly confused.

"type in Miss-brainbox for me and click on the link." she said. He typed in the name and a picture of Sara acme up on his screen.

"Cath what the hell is this?" he asked again more sternly

"just read it." she said before hanging up.

Grissom sighed before clicking on the link and reading the long message. He was surprised when he saw it was about him. _I knew that I was in love with him _and _loving someone who will never love me back_ made him think, maybe he had been harsh towards her.

He sighed once more and pushed the whole thought of Sara away. He grabbed his coat and headed for the door. Leaving his heart behind him.

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So tell me what you think so far. I am planning to do a second chapter but you have to tell me what you think about this one first.

Please, please, please review my story…it will make my day


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